This must be the work of an enemy Stand! - Let's Play JoJo's Bizarre Adventure: The 7th Stand User

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Last time, we deduced Kakyoin was a fake because he was somehow acting even creepier than usual, then boarded a train to India. Prepare yourself for some more incredibly unflattering depictions of foreign countries from Japan’s perspective.



In case you needed a reminder that Joseph is British. Yikes.



I’ve gotta start addressing all the white people I know with “Fear not, my lily-white friends!” A fair percentage of them are lesbians too so I’d really be getting that bang for my buck.

Abdul: Well, shall we be going? To Calcutta!

Checking my files here and yeah I ain’t uploading all these crowd screenshots, sorry. You get the digest version.

Various People in Crowd:

  • Very Shady Man: Want to convert your dollars? I’ve got the best rates in town!
  • Questionable Man: Want some stomach medicine? It’s good for you!
  • Medicine Man: Hello, friends! I’ve got hash here! Mary-jane! Cheap, quality stuff!
  • Filthy Man: Need a hotel? I’ll show you one!
  • Oddball: I’ll sing for you! Aaaahhh ommmm tooooooohhhh…
  • Traveling Merchant: Cameras! Watches! Pens! Lighters! Wanna sell? I’ll buy it at a high price!
  • Hippie: Want me to introduce you to a nice girl? Very young! No grannies!
  • Lost Child: Waaahhh!! Mommyyyy!!
  • Delivery Boy: Hey, move it! Can’t you see I’ve got eggs to deliver!?
  • Man Sleeping on Sidewalk: Zzz… Zzz…
  • Singing Boy: Aaaaahhh… Ohhhhhhh… Somikaaaaiiiinooooooo…
  • Man Sleeping on Road: Zzz… Zzz…
  • Child: Baksheesh! Baksheesh! Give me!
  • Boy: If you don’t give me any, you’ll go to hell, sir!
  • Child: Give it to meee!

Tag yourself.

Polnareff: Ewwwww… I just stepped in cow shit!
Kakyoin: Somebody just stole my wallet.
Cascada: I just got pressured into buying something weird…
Joseph: I-I can’t stand this any longer! Hey, taxi! Take me to this address!

Beggars:

  • A: Here! I’ll open the door for you, sir! May I have a tip?
  • B: No, let me do it!
  • C: I was here first!
  • All: Give us money! Give us money!


Polnareff: Hey! Don’t wipe your nose on me!
Joseph: A-Abdul… Is this really India?

You’re pretty alright, Abdul.


It’s hub time again! I didn’t think about this in the first 7-8 updates but as they become more common my workload has substantially increased!! Oops!!!

Cascada: Sure, seeing as I’ll be killing like a hundred of them by the time I get back to the hotel.

PDB / Rohan:

Heh heh… A ghost friend of mine told me about 'em. Apparently, even if you defeat the user, the Stands won’t disappear. Thinking that was odd, she tracked down the source. Element of Freedom… That’s the name of the Stand! The user is a woman named Alicia, and she’s not working for Dio! That’s all she knew, but I looked into the matter for myself…
She can change the flames of life into Stand form. Those who are possessed by the Stand can gain its abilities and create more of them. Its goal is to propagate by sapping away the life energy of others… Kind of like sowing seeds. I’m not entirely sure what she’s using those Stands for… Maybe she’s a member of the group called the Slaves to something-or-other?

There’s your explanation for the Burns/Spirits family of enemies. Not necessarily inherently evil or malicious, but easily co-opted by those who are. I guess there are enough assassins targeting us at all times that its only natural the will-o-wisps do too.

Restaurant check time. Alas, I believe Joseph’s running food commentary only happens in Hong Kong and Singapore.

Chai just means tea, but this probably is referring to the famous masala chai (the stuff marketed in the west as just “chai”) with various spices in it. “Fish Johl” is most likely machher jhol, a spicy fish curry. Shukto is a bitter vegetable curry, and mutton is sheep meat.

Aside, since I’m also guilty of it just now: the term “curry” comes from a Tamil word for “sauce”. The British looked at various distinct Indian dishes with sauces or gravies and were content to lump them all together as “curry”, which is kind of like if you looked at every single kind of noodle soup in East Asia and lumped them all together as “ramen”. Or, if you want a decidedly worse analogy, it’s like how your parents looked at all of your different video game consoles but still called them all “Nintendo”.

Cascada: …Steel, is she here? Vins? If you give me that “ohhhh I’m prerecorded” shit…
Steel: …I’m just a fragment, a memory. I can only tell you what I can sense right now…
Cascada: -sigh- Fine. Hit me.
Steel: So we’ve finally reached India… About time, eh? …I’m sure you’re exhausted, but I doubt these assassins will provide us ample time to rest. The man with two right hands is somewhere here… And one more… A gunman who seems to have been dropped in the wrong era. Both of them should be formidable opponents. Once you’ve prepared, meet with everyone in the hotel restaurant.

As if car accidents don’t happen in Japan. How else would all the stupid isekai bullshit happen? Bad jokes aside, Shibuya Scramble is a genuinely incredible feat and I have no clue how they manage that shit.

In Singapore everyone was at the hotel, but most maps are going to be more like Hong Kong Harbor where the party is scattered around. Abdul is here right outside the inn.

Abdul: Hello. How’s India treating you?
Cascada: That guy earlier sold me something called “Kathmandu Temple Kief” and I’m probably gonna give it a shot later.
Abdul: …I see…


The encounter table in Calcutta isn’t much different from Singapore: Assassins, Murderdolls Lv4, Zombies, Bombs, et cetera. If we hadn’t defeated Kate on the Strength ship, there’d be Green Hornets too, but this is the last map they’d appear in.


There are children all over the map who want money. “Yes” gives them 5G (not that 5G), which has a small chance of lowering your bad karma if you accumulated any and will cause them to follow you around the map.



The Calcutta map is divided by a river into two big chunks, and all the Zombie encounters here are confined to under the bridge.

Italian spotted! Sound the alarm!


Oof. A terrible roll for Cascada and Abdul, who both rely on magic damage.

I feel like the R patch must have slowed him down or something, because in all my previous playthroughs I only caught up to Tonio maybe once. This is like the fourth time now.

The will-o-wisps - or, I suppose, Elements of Freedom - are now a full combo platter. They generally still drop to one Thunder Beam from The Machine, and on the off chance something survives then every other party member also has an all-target attack by now. Prime grinding fodder - I get everyone up to at minimum level 18 by the end of the update.

Cascada: Got any Zojirushi?




Useless scrap, you say? Well, if you remember something that I totally forgot about, then you’ll realize this is far from being mere useless scrap.

Update 3 said…

Pretend that for every mouthful of food or drink Cascada’s had thus far, she’s had to also awkwardly feed loose nuts and bolts into the little skull face on her elbow.


A unique interaction, just for us! 500 G isn’t quite worth it compared to getting some potions from the vending machine (I don’t think you can do this in-battle), but I think it’s a cool detail.

We head north to check out the rest of the map’s east side.

Colonialism at work. My family travelled a lot while I was a kid and pre-teen and I didn’t understand until I was a bit older that it was mostly for mission trips and proselytizing. My brother still does that shit.

yikes


At least the kids are mostly alright. This is some solid advice.

Next door to the church is this building that’d be a weapon shop in any other RPG.




me when I don’t take my ADHD meds (also a lot of the time even when I do)

What kind of asshole would pick “No” in a situation like this?


Cascada: Oh, yeah, I can probably do that. One Heat Ray coming up!
Abdul: Forgive me, but I believe this requires finer control than your Stand is capable of.
Cascada: Come on, when have I ever missed a shot?
Abdul: I do not refer to your aim, but the fact your beams are focused towards killing, not cleaning.
Cascada: I mean… I GUESS you have a point…
Abdul: So you just need someone to pinpoint the flame to the impurities, correct?




Cascada: That’s Abdul for you!
Cascada: Fixing all his problems by burning them.
Abdul: And you do not?
Cascada: Sometimes I spray them with water like unruly cats.

Always nice to help folks out.


Yep, definitely handmade by a guy who died in 1918.

Tonio took most of our cash, so we can’t afford to drop the rest on some dubious medicine. Dubious tomes, on the other hand…

Abdul: Oh, a bookstore! Cascada, would you mind terribly if I were to stop and look for a bit?
Cascada: Yeah, I guess I don’t mind…
Abdul: Sorry! Hmmm… There are a lot of interesting ones here…


Abdul: …Oh no! I-I’m so sorry, Cascada! I didn’t mean to make you wait that long!
Cascada: No, I don’t mind one bit. Is that book interesting? You seemed pretty absorbed in it.
Abdul: Oh, interesting doesn’t even begin to describe it! I love collecting old books like these. Actually, since we’re in India anyway, I’d really like to visit Daryaganj. Maybe I’ll come back once we’ve finished our journey.
Cascada: Daryaganj? Is that a book fair?
Abdul: Yes, a very famous one in Old Delhi. It’s a bustling outdoor market where all sorts of rare publications are bought and sold.
Cascada: Wow… Almost sounds like a festival.
Abdul: Yes, it’s very exciting! I’ll have to show you around someday.
Cascada: Wow, really? I’ll be looking forward to it!

Apparently a specific restaurant in Daryaganj also invented several internationally known Indian dishes, including murgh makhani (butter chicken).

Seeing this event with Abdul does in fact add a new item to our inventory.


Cascada is now a Ripple user, and she didn’t even need to train under an Italian dandy to get there. Joseph can step right off.

Cascada: I can only blaze it SO OFTEN, dude. Maybe next time.

A block or so north of the bookstore is this building.



Fixing the forge with Abdul means the souvenir shop starts selling the Talwar, which is involved in a particularly insane sidequest that involves beating the game at least three times and getting a random drop from a secret superboss. Even if we could afford it, I’ve already messed up the earliest requirements on this playthrough.

Upstairs, there’s this guy.


Cascada: Hey what do you think would happen if I did my Ripple Breathing while smoking that weed I got?
Abdul: Perhaps we could wait to find out until after our journey is over?
Cascada: Look, if you don’t wanna have FUN, just say so.


Cascada: Polnareff, you’d be cool with me smoking this grass with ancient mega-breathing, right?
Polnareff: Err… perhaps ask Mister Joestar…
Abdul: -sigh- I’ll head back to the hotel.

Polnareff is already level 18 from cutting about ten thousand evil freight hooks, and he was also last place in the Best Bud Poll. I do his event and then immediately load a save to keep his FP low.

Cascada: They’ve got books in all kinds of languages.
Polnareff: Oh! T-this book!
Cascada: What is it?
Polnareff: Huh? Oh, er… Nothing! 'Scuse me, sir, but I’ll take this one.
Cascada: ? …Just what kind of book did you buy?



If you ask to see it, Polnareff freaks out and says it’s not for kids; stock joke, laugh track, et cetera. I kinda think it’s funnier if Cascada simply does not give a shit.

Across the bridge we go.



Cascada: What are your feelings on me mega-smoking this presumably cannabis-based product?
Kakyoin: Is that behavior becoming of a lady such as yourself?
Cascada: You’re right, it’d be a waste to do it next to a wet blanket.


There are a couple player Stands that could fix this problem. Arm cannon is not one of them, unfortunately.




Cascada: Should I blast him?
Kakyoin: Murder is generally frowned upon in charming foreign cultures such as this. It’s one of the many beliefs of the Indian people.
Cascada: jesus christ dude listen to yourself


The other houses on the west side are dimly lit, as noted.


Kakyoin: Though I quite like ripe and aged blossoms myself…



Go back to your own game, Aeris.

Cascada: I’m good with the brass knuckles, thanks.



I’m ambivalent on saying phrases like this in a local language if you don’t speak said language. It often strikes me as a bit patronizing, but is it worse to assume they know enough English or whatever to understand you? My father was the kind of person who corrected people on their English and never spoke Cantonese at home, and I just know I’d be totally butchering the random phrases my parents attempted to teach me as a child.

Cascada: Kakyoin! Don’t just use me as an excuse to buy flowers from her!
Kakyoin: Sorry! …But those flowers really suit you.
Cascada: Whatever, at least you’re happy…

I go looking for an event that’s listed as happening in this bottom corner of the map for a few minutes before realizing it’s exclusive to male player characters. Oh well.

Cascada: Kakyoin, do me a favor?
Kakyoin: By all means, Cascada.
Cascada: Give these flowers to someone else and think about why I wanted brass knuckles instead of jewelry.
Kakyoin: -frown-

Time to roll with the Joestars.

Cascada: Weed?
Jotaro: Straight edge for life.
Cascada: And here I thought you cut class to do drugs behind the bleachers and get into fistfights.
Jotaro: I cut class to attend D.A.R.E. meetings… and get into fistfights.

Here’s your hint for how to actually get down under the bridge.

Cascada: Looks like they’ve got Japanese books too.
Jotaro: …Hm? This one’s about boats.
Cascada: “Ship Structural Analysis & Design”… Looks like a difficult read.


Jotaro: …Pretty interesting. This’ll be good for killing time while we travel.
Cascada: You mean you can understand it?
Jotaro: I like the pretty pictures.
Jotaro: Yeah. It’s not that hard once you start to really read it. 300G, huh? I’ll take it.

We head back westward.



If you walk down the center of the bridge/road, this car will absolutely crash into you and deal a bunch of damage. If you’re with Jotaro or have a couple specific player Stands, this happens instead.



Jotaro: Don’t worry, I’ve got this.
Jotaro: -double-fisting spanners- ORAORAORAORAORA


You can only do this after Jotaro buys his ship book on the east side, so it’s pretty easy to miss if you aren’t using a guide.

Vaporizing assassins and changing lives.


Cascada: Sure, why not.


Blood!

Jotaro: ! …It must be a Stand! Ugh… My wrist… It’s mummified! It’s sucking the water out of our bodies! We’d better defeat this thing, fast!



Black Eyed Peas (which only ever reminds me that Fergie’s father was a teacher at my high school for a while) is a bit annoying with its absorbing attacks, but its max HP is low and Cascada is a glass cannon. It doesn’t last long.

It has a decent chance of dropping a Black Tree Fruit (20%+40 HP, 20%+25 SP) and you can do this as many times as you can afford it, but I don’t bother.

Somewhat early FP check. We’re already well past the 30 total FP threshold for unlocking NG+ (the game assumes you’re playing a bit more organically and not hitting every event). Jotaro’s in the lead from the Yellow Temperance fight and Joseph doesn’t have any events in Calcutta (at least not in the route I’m on), so he’s lagging behind. We also want to keep Polnareff’s FP below 10 for a specific reason later.

I’m writing this update only a bit after the Best Buds Poll ended (though it won’t be up for a couple weeks), so I’m a little stumped about how I’m going to handle this going forward. I intend to keep the Joestars and Abdul as even as possible unless some comments really tip the scales, but that’s easier said than done.


Cascada: I can handle myself, old timer. I have an arm cannon.
Joseph: I didn’t team up with a Nazi in the Mexican desert to blow up an ancient super-vampire to take lip from you, kid.


Joseph: Be careful over there.
Cascada: So, I learned about this Ripple thing… Isn’t that what you can do?
Joseph: Ahhh, that brings me back. I suppose India borders Nepal and Tibet, so people might have heard of it around here. And if somebody’s going around making zombies, I’ll need to stay on my toes!
Cascada: How does it work, exactly?
Joseph: By breathing in the correct rhythm, you can generate ripples through your bloodstream that mimic solar rays and channel your vital energy. It’s extremely difficult, even if you’ve got the knack for it.
Cascada: Okay, cool. So, if you were to - hypothetically of course - smoke some serious drugs with this special breathing…

Joseph: Well, I don’t know about smoking, but we snuffed TONS of cocaine during… The War.
Cascada: no wait shit
Joseph: Let me tell you ALL about those days…


Joseph: OH NOOO!!!
Cascada: Oh gosh that looks pretty bad, Mister Joestar. We’d better get you back to the hotel RIGHT AWAY.



Joseph: Does it look infected?
Cascada: You’ll be fine… probably. Let’s get you patched up and have a nice lunch, alright old timer?

See you next time for a big ol’ plot episode!

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