Nearly broke a kid’s ankles at work today, that was fucking scary. She turned around and ran right to her mom, barely look to see if the way was clear, when I was passing between them with a flatbad cart, and then went in front of me when I stopped. At first she took a wide enough turn that I figured I might have been able to get away with just slowing down, instead of stopping outright, but then before I even finished thinking it she veered way closer and nearly hit the cart even WITH me full stopped. The mom didn’t seem to notice, either, and then when I had to come back through that area it nearly happened again (this time she did look before running and did not move until I was past)
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Been depressed about plural-related things but we did find a gift card that still had money on it in the process of cleaning our room so we bought some new clothes
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: finishing out this extremely bad week with getting sick oops
Just fever, chills, and body aches, so nothing bad
Todays been good otherwise at least
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overall an okay day but spent a good chunk trying to prepare for crowdfunding/job apps/attempting to get money and that always stresses me out so pretty sad. hoping playing a game or watching something will help
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my neuros are really diverging the past few days. feels like wading thru mud trying to get anything done and that’s ON my meds. 
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Awful. Despite doing a kickass 1cc attempt this morning, rest of the day has been shit, and i have a “how dare you ask me to do work at my job vibe” just waiting it out till i can get a burger and a shake at the local diner so hopefully that picks me up.
EDIT: Place with shakes closes @ 2 so ill probably just go to cookout. Or get ice cream on the way home, but i could use some ice cream after today.
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back home with our parents from our partner’s place after job’s didn’t pan out unfortunately. it’s really weird, after being there for like a month and a half everything here feels alien, even our own room and stuff. i genuinely forgot that we had our current dog instead of the previous one. i guess a lotta this can be chocked up to the dissociation and memory issues. it’s not bad but it’s really strange. i just hope we can get used to being back.
our mom has been talking to me about going to a fast-track culinary school thing and honestly the idea is getting more appealing. we greatly enjoyed cooking while with our partner.
it’s gonna be rough being long distance again and i miss our partner, but we’ve done it for over 2 years, we can do it some more.
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A guy from missouri came into the library at the last minute and we had a nice chat about our japanese learning journeys. That was a notable pick me up, but i still got ice cream after my shift was done.
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I’m sure dissociation and memory stuff intensifies this in general, but it’s always a bit of An Adjustment when you leave home to live somewhere else. Even a month and a half is enough for things to feel a little weird, especially if you’ve kind of mentally put down roots already in the new place. I hope your readjustment goes smoothly though - as with a lot of this stuff, it just takes some time.
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yeah that’s true. i think that’s what i meant and that it was being exacerbated by dissociation, i just didn’t phrase it right :p thank you for the well wishes!
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: illness has been replaced with Stabbing Headache at the base of the skull + mild disorientation while standing
Not bad enough to put off work though so wahey (my choice dw) and the other symptoms have vanished entirely
Hopefully this too shall pass
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Finally got my brain together and body up in time to go grocery shopping.
I start my new job Monday next week (not tomorrow; the one after), and I’m hoping to really get the house in more working order before I’m stuck in an office 5 days a week.
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My last week before work, and my focus is on cleaning up and getting the house in order since I’ll be out of it five days a week. That included doing a bit belated monthly migration of my todo list bujo, and my monthly tarot reading.
Gonna practice some Japanese because I haven’t done that in a while, try to get some fresh air by playing Pokemon Go, and later have therapy.
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got those “last day before going back to work” blues and feeling a little sick, BUT my partner’s started Final Fantasy IX and he’s met my favorite character so I’m just chinhands and writing notes furiously for my own purposes
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yesterday was tough today is tough i am tired
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First time (that I’m aware of) that students have made a meme about me and my classes. A kid showed me today one he had made to troll his bud with the text “When mfers say they hate school but they get to [My last name’s] english” alongside a gif of some people hype as fuck.
Makes me feel good and keeps me in the damn job.
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wait i completely forgot last month was the 1 year anneversary of our plural epiphany. whoops.
i guess that’s fair though, the past few months we’ve just been trying to focus on our life and being a person as opposed to really worrying about our plurality.
anyways, i’m starting to get used to being back home again thankfully. i do miss our partner but it is nice to have real alone time. kind of a relief to be able to just be alone and do whatever instead of constantly subconsciously having the mask of “partner” on.
we’re trying to get applied for culinary school this semester so we can start getting an associate’s in that. it’ll be a lot but hopefully we can handle it better than the last two semesters of college since we’ll actually be attending in person. plus cooking and culinary science are things we greatly enjoy.
i’ve been thinking about trying to grow small herbs/vegetables indoors. it sounds like a fun hobby. i’ve also been really wanting to mess around with tape digitization and digital video to analogue. but to really do anything beyond playing HDMI on old TVs i’d need a capture card and probably some blank tapes. a project for the future at least. wonder if i could get for our birthday when it rolls around.
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HELL YEAH
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Blah, stayed up too late this past weekend and didn’t nip this cold in the bud, now I’m full on sick. Might take tomorrow off to try and get some more sleep in and feel better. Cough Syrup always makes my brain feel fuzzy (because we still get it with Pseudephedrine here in Canada)
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had to make a police report for dangerous driving bc an old dude ran a red light at a crossing right before my eyes and didn’t seem to realise he’d done it (I am fine, I was crossing but he was still several metres in front of me so not a particularly close call), they rang me back basically immediately like ‘oh it’s really HARD to get CCTV footage… also you’d have to make a statement and go to court and stuff… :(’ utterly pathetic. I gave them the precise time and location. what is even the point of living in a surveillance state if I can’t use it to my advantage I ask you. now I get to feel gross for having to interact with the police AND pissed off over how useless they are.
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